Fabulous Squash

Wake up hungry one morning, hankering for melon. Make one deep cut into a lovely oval one until your dear husband, who is rather more awake than you in the mornings, points out that you are handling a spaghetti squash, not a melon. Mope a bit, then put the melon/squash back in the fridge.

Three weeks later, observe that your diet is lacking in vegetables. Unearth the squash and, using the handy incision you have already made (you really are so very clever!), cut it in half. This takes a rather sharp knife. Scrape out the seeds and tendrils as you would for a jack-o-lantern. Daydream about tootsie rolls for a moment. Place face down in a pyrex dish (small enough to rotate in your ancient microwave) with an inch or so of water and cover with a paper towel. Microwave for 20 minutes on regular setting. Try to pierce the skin with a fork; nearly break tines of said fork. Microwave for seven minutes. Try again to no avail. Take a shower and have someone else microwave for somewhere between 5 and 30 minutes. Remove when you can pierce it easily with a fork. Let it steam for a bit before flipping it over and scraping out the strands into a large bowl. Toss with just a little butter or olive oil, a pinch of oregano or thyme, and a generous grating of parmesan cheese. Eat the entire bowl with your husband while watching "Dancing with the Stars". Feel virtuous. Repeat.