A Pudding Cup Saved is a Can of Beans Earned
My regular boss is out of town. I have two other partners I help, but they generally don't have much for me to do, since the one who is out of town takes up all of my time. After checking the real news (NY Times), the fake news (The Onion), and the trashy news (gofugyourself, usweekly) online, I broke down and asked everyone in my department if they needed help. None of them did, so I balanced my checkbook. This is an activity I actually enjoy, especially at work, because a) there are always pencils with sharpened tips AND working erasers, and b) that’s where the good calculator is.
The cockles of my penny-pinching heart cooled, however, when I learned that, once outstanding checks are cashed and the gold dust settles, we’ll have $90 to spend until our payday eight days away. This is a particular challenge since we face it at the beginning of a week, meaning we have to make it cover two sets of groceries and dry-cleaning.
I acknowledge that I have lived on less than that, even less than half of that, but it was when I had no gas to pay, no insurance bills, did not require coffee (i.e. was not bored out of my mind at work) and lived in a country with socialized medicine ($45 for an overnight hospital stay!).
I wrote my husband an e-mail warning him of the situation and asking him not to buy the pudding snacks I requested (it’s his week for groceries), intending to save us a whopping $2.08. I then erased the message and called him. I asked him what he thought of skipping the grocery store and getting as much as he could at the farmers’ market with the cash he withdrew for the purpose yesterday. He happily complied, as he prefers to live off local pork, cheese and vegetables. He also, like me, enjoys a challenge, so we decided to see how long we could go on goods from the farmer's market and the contents of our kitchen. And now we are officially committed, beholden to all two people who may potentially read my blog!
This what we have on the kitchen counter:
~Five tomatoes
~Two eggplants
~Two red peppers
~Eighteen peaches (I’m a bit of a fanatic)
~One lime*
~Two half-loaves of drying bread
~Three boxes of cereal in various stages of fullness**
In the fridge:
~One leftover Italian sausage
~Three cups leftover pasta
~Two cups leftover tomato sauce
~A few celery stalks
~Assorted condiments
~A little black bean hummus
~Various hard and soft cheeses
~Two dozen eggs
~Skim milk for me, whole milk for him
~3 pudding cups
~Two small flour tortillas
~A bag of pine nuts
~Other bits: some jam, half a jar of peanut butter, half a jar of salsa, cilantro, rotting hot peppers, wine.
In the pantry:
~Chickpeas
~Black beans
~Hominy (what is this? can I have it for dinner?)
~2 boxes of pasta
~2 of mac & cheese
~2 boxes of tofu (Cha-ching! Protein jackpot!)
~Powdered Gatorade, tea, cocoa and all the regular staples ***
The freezer:
~Sugar-free popsicles we accidentally bought and will never eat but will never throw out because one day we might eat them
~Other desserty things containing plenty of sugar, thus much more likely to be eaten
~A box of puff pastry that has been through at least one move
~Frozen potstickers (I’m going to try not to eat them in the first two days)
~A three-pound chuck roast
~A bit of raw frozen corn off the cob
~Edamame
~A Tupperware with heavily-freezer-burned chicken cacciatore (I’m guessing here. I’m also guessing we will never eat whatever it is, since I didn’t know what it was the last time I cleaned the freezer four months ago, and it will continue to take up ¼ of our tiny freezer and support the ice trays until we move out and have to de-frost the whole appliance.)
~A box of lima beans
~Plenty of pesto
~One small frozen tilapia filet
Joshua’s garden has:
~All kinds of herbs
~Swiss chard
~Lots of garlic
~Egyptian onions
~Peanuts
~Some other stuff, blah blah blah I’m a bad wife and never help so I don’t know.
MENUS
This is as far as I have gotten tonight. I didn't get too far on the lunches, but I am hoping for a burst of creativity tomorrow. Or help from my readers! Suggestions! Or a big fat check!
Tonight:
Toasted crusty bread with bean spread. Sliced tomato and peppers. Hard-boiled egg.
My husband will have leftover pasta.
Wednesday lunches:
My husband: leftover pasta with sauce
Moi: black bean hummus & vegetable wrap (ooh, I think I have a carrot at work!)
Wednesday supper: bits of toast with goat cheese and re-sauted sausage. Chickpea cakes with sliced peppers.
Thursday:
Grilled eggplants. Marinated, grilled tofu
Friday:
Mac & cheese? We’re usually pretty wiped out by Friday
Saturday:
We are out of town for a friend’s wedding. I wonder how big the pockets in Joshua’s suit are?
Sunday:
Lunch at a friend’s house. Maybe we can put on a little yellow face paint so we look sickly and she sends us home with lots of leftovers.
If not:
Sunday dinner
Modified Pasta Carbonara (sauted green onions instead of bacon)
Phew, I think I just wrote right through my usual post-yoga eating binge. Score! Money saved.
I’ll keep you posted.****
*All but the lime came from the farmer’s market, where today they were serving free hot dogs, chips and baked beans. He ate a hot dog but did not even think about filling his pockets for me. I’m going to line them with Ziploc baggies tomorrow in case he comes across any more free food.
**I refuse, however, to eat the raisin bran, it angers me more than any breakfast cereal should. It has twice the sugar of a serving of Lucky Charms. TWICE! Beware if you are trying to encourage your tummy to decrease in size. Fill up if, like my husband, you are trying to encourage your tummy to expand in size.
***I think this is key—we would not survive the week if we were out of the necessaries like soy sauce, olive oil, vinegar, sugar, and four kinds of hot chocolate.
**** After I finished writing, my husband called from the gym to say he’d gotten a Charlie orse and was going to buy a banana. I tried to talk him out of it (“Maybe you can borrow a banana! Gatorade has tons of potassium! [a lie-1% of the RDA] Not really! But you can’t buy any food because I just said on my blog that we weren’t spending any money on groceries and that would make us hypocrites! [another lie—I was still in the proofreading stage]” I finally caved and asked him to buy me one, too. He bought 2.83 lbs for 96 cents. Hey wait! Sounds like an emergency medical expense! We have a whole savings account for that!
The cockles of my penny-pinching heart cooled, however, when I learned that, once outstanding checks are cashed and the gold dust settles, we’ll have $90 to spend until our payday eight days away. This is a particular challenge since we face it at the beginning of a week, meaning we have to make it cover two sets of groceries and dry-cleaning.
I acknowledge that I have lived on less than that, even less than half of that, but it was when I had no gas to pay, no insurance bills, did not require coffee (i.e. was not bored out of my mind at work) and lived in a country with socialized medicine ($45 for an overnight hospital stay!).
I wrote my husband an e-mail warning him of the situation and asking him not to buy the pudding snacks I requested (it’s his week for groceries), intending to save us a whopping $2.08. I then erased the message and called him. I asked him what he thought of skipping the grocery store and getting as much as he could at the farmers’ market with the cash he withdrew for the purpose yesterday. He happily complied, as he prefers to live off local pork, cheese and vegetables. He also, like me, enjoys a challenge, so we decided to see how long we could go on goods from the farmer's market and the contents of our kitchen. And now we are officially committed, beholden to all two people who may potentially read my blog!
This what we have on the kitchen counter:
~Five tomatoes
~Two eggplants
~Two red peppers
~Eighteen peaches (I’m a bit of a fanatic)
~One lime*
~Two half-loaves of drying bread
~Three boxes of cereal in various stages of fullness**
In the fridge:
~One leftover Italian sausage
~Three cups leftover pasta
~Two cups leftover tomato sauce
~A few celery stalks
~Assorted condiments
~A little black bean hummus
~Various hard and soft cheeses
~Two dozen eggs
~Skim milk for me, whole milk for him
~3 pudding cups
~Two small flour tortillas
~A bag of pine nuts
~Other bits: some jam, half a jar of peanut butter, half a jar of salsa, cilantro, rotting hot peppers, wine.
In the pantry:
~Chickpeas
~Black beans
~Hominy (what is this? can I have it for dinner?)
~2 boxes of pasta
~2 of mac & cheese
~2 boxes of tofu (Cha-ching! Protein jackpot!)
~Powdered Gatorade, tea, cocoa and all the regular staples ***
The freezer:
~Sugar-free popsicles we accidentally bought and will never eat but will never throw out because one day we might eat them
~Other desserty things containing plenty of sugar, thus much more likely to be eaten
~A box of puff pastry that has been through at least one move
~Frozen potstickers (I’m going to try not to eat them in the first two days)
~A three-pound chuck roast
~A bit of raw frozen corn off the cob
~Edamame
~A Tupperware with heavily-freezer-burned chicken cacciatore (I’m guessing here. I’m also guessing we will never eat whatever it is, since I didn’t know what it was the last time I cleaned the freezer four months ago, and it will continue to take up ¼ of our tiny freezer and support the ice trays until we move out and have to de-frost the whole appliance.)
~A box of lima beans
~Plenty of pesto
~One small frozen tilapia filet
Joshua’s garden has:
~All kinds of herbs
~Swiss chard
~Lots of garlic
~Egyptian onions
~Peanuts
~Some other stuff, blah blah blah I’m a bad wife and never help so I don’t know.
MENUS
This is as far as I have gotten tonight. I didn't get too far on the lunches, but I am hoping for a burst of creativity tomorrow. Or help from my readers! Suggestions! Or a big fat check!
Tonight:
Toasted crusty bread with bean spread. Sliced tomato and peppers. Hard-boiled egg.
My husband will have leftover pasta.
Wednesday lunches:
My husband: leftover pasta with sauce
Moi: black bean hummus & vegetable wrap (ooh, I think I have a carrot at work!)
Wednesday supper: bits of toast with goat cheese and re-sauted sausage. Chickpea cakes with sliced peppers.
Thursday:
Grilled eggplants. Marinated, grilled tofu
Friday:
Mac & cheese? We’re usually pretty wiped out by Friday
Saturday:
We are out of town for a friend’s wedding. I wonder how big the pockets in Joshua’s suit are?
Sunday:
Lunch at a friend’s house. Maybe we can put on a little yellow face paint so we look sickly and she sends us home with lots of leftovers.
If not:
Sunday dinner
Modified Pasta Carbonara (sauted green onions instead of bacon)
Phew, I think I just wrote right through my usual post-yoga eating binge. Score! Money saved.
I’ll keep you posted.****
*All but the lime came from the farmer’s market, where today they were serving free hot dogs, chips and baked beans. He ate a hot dog but did not even think about filling his pockets for me. I’m going to line them with Ziploc baggies tomorrow in case he comes across any more free food.
**I refuse, however, to eat the raisin bran, it angers me more than any breakfast cereal should. It has twice the sugar of a serving of Lucky Charms. TWICE! Beware if you are trying to encourage your tummy to decrease in size. Fill up if, like my husband, you are trying to encourage your tummy to expand in size.
***I think this is key—we would not survive the week if we were out of the necessaries like soy sauce, olive oil, vinegar, sugar, and four kinds of hot chocolate.
**** After I finished writing, my husband called from the gym to say he’d gotten a Charlie orse and was going to buy a banana. I tried to talk him out of it (“Maybe you can borrow a banana! Gatorade has tons of potassium! [a lie-1% of the RDA] Not really! But you can’t buy any food because I just said on my blog that we weren’t spending any money on groceries and that would make us hypocrites! [another lie—I was still in the proofreading stage]” I finally caved and asked him to buy me one, too. He bought 2.83 lbs for 96 cents. Hey wait! Sounds like an emergency medical expense! We have a whole savings account for that!
posted by Nev at
6:43 PM
3 Comments:
Not Armistead but LouLou.
Thoughts on alternative meals- fritatas are nice in the summer with zucchini and basil plus a bit of garlic. It travels in a lunch box too. White or black bean salad with whatever green are in the garden and a side of a hard boiled egg. Even better idea is to mention the blog to doting parents so they will read it and feel a need to search their larder for interesting staples to add to the pot so to speak. Isn't that why the world goes around - because some parents are back there pushing even if the effort is unnecessary? Check the car this weekend. There may be a stray bag of food lurking there. LouLou
neville-
wonderful stuff if it does make me a bit hungry.
While it in no way reflects the literary value of your work, you should be warned that gmail decided your link was spam... In case it affected other Gmail users, two of which I believe have about a hunder pounds of assorted meat and shellfish in a deep freeze.
Keep it coming,
love
ernst
Great post! With that pantry and your two creative brains, you might actually have fun coming up with ways to feed yourselves. And some day, when you're the parents of whiny teenagers, you'll have a good story to show them just how good they've got it.
And if you get desperate, there's always dumpster diving behind fancy grocery stores...
Post a Comment
Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]
<< Home